Our baby was born on Christmas, so we didn't really have an opportunity to dwell on whether or not to start the Santa tradition with him this year. And at only 1 week postpartum, I was in too much of a zombi-like exhausted way to even think about New Years. I think I went to bed around 7pm that night (and woke up again to nurse at 9pm, 11pm, 1am...)

But with Easter upon us tomorrow, we have arrived at the first holiday that involves some sort of festivities. Of course, at 3 months old, he wouldn't have a clue what an easter basket or bunny are, but when do you start these kinds of traditions with your child?? I suppose you could start right away from birth, with the idea that so early it's more for the parents' sake, and for photo memories. An infant in the arms of a drunken shopping mall Santa, a baby pumpkin being strolled around the nabe trick-or-treating, etc. I kinda feel like maybe we'll start all of these things after Kenzo is 1 year old. But I have a sinking feeling we are just so damn lazy it'll keep getting put off. There should be a guidebook for things like this. You know, What to Expect the First Year tells you when your baby should be able to coo or sit up or eat solid food, etc. It should tell you when you should celebrate holidays!

It's not just the when of celebrating I'm concerned with but also the how. Santa, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny - these are all fun but if you really think about it, you are LYING to your children!! And promoting commercialism and greed and unhealthy eating habits. Whoa. Yes. I really went there. I'm not religious. I kinda flip flop between agnostic and atheist, but I've always felt really strange how we lie to children about Santa and tell them they can believe in something they can't see, just like God. But then, wait a minute, they get to a certain age and shut the front door - The Easter Bunny isn't real? The Tooth Fairy isn't real?? SANTA ISN'T REAL?????!! But... God is real? And I should believe my parents who have been lying to me about this for years and years why??? Hmph. Am I the only one who sees it this way? Perhaps I need a therapist... ^_^ I sure would like to avoid this kind of confusion for our dear little boy, without depriving him of the fun and carefree childhood he deserves.

We got sent home from the hospital with a starter pack of Pampers Swaddlers. They seemed to be working well and after finishing those up we moved on to the mega pack of Huggies Little Snugglers that had been purchased off of my baby registry and had been sitting around for weeks. They seemed like they'd be great, they had the nice cutout for the umbilical cord, cool! Unfortunately they cutouts were not snug on Kenzo's skinny thighs and his poo leaked out like crazy. So, after a couple days of nightmare laundry detail, we ran off to the store and got a big pack of the Pampers and stuck with that ever since! But they're so expensive. So as he was about to finish off his latest pack and move up a size, I decided to give Luvs a try. Thankfully they seem to be working fine, they are the cutest design wise, but they don't have the wetness indicator that Pampers and Huggies had. At this point, we don't really need the indicator cuz you can just feel if the diaper is full. But in the first couple of months, we did rely on it!

ANYWAY, all along I kept thinking they should sell smaller sample size packs so you can try out the diapers before buying the mega packs. Unfortunately it seems the smallest retail size packs they sell are about 40 diapers or so. Not too bad, but still... So a few weeks ago hubby and I were chilling on the sofa with our baby, as you do, and I came up with the idea of selling sampler packs of diapers - including a few of several different brands making it easy to figure out which one works best for your baby.

From there I hit the ground running - ordered supplies, took product photos, purchased a domain and got a website up, and as of yesterday have officially launched my new company: Miny Moe!

For now we're just selling the newborn diaper sampler pack (5 diapers each from Pampers, Huggies, Luvs, Earth's Best, Target brand, and Walmart brand) and a nursing pad sampler pack.(1 pair from 7 different brands - 3 disposables and 4 washables). I really hope that word of mouth and marketing pays off and orders come in. If it's successful I will add bigger size sampler packs and who knows what else! But, we'll start off with the very basics. My feeling is that these would be AWESOME baby shower gifts, as well as things that mom or dad would buy directly.

And with that, I am officially a momtrepreneur!! Now it's all about getting the word out through social media (blog, twitter, facebook) and hoping some orders start coming in.

So, if you know a new or expecting mom, why not gift her one of our packs?? I will love you forever, and hopefully she will, too! ^_^

I knew breastfeeding would hurt and be challenging, but I never questioned whether I would do it or not. I knew deep down that I would breastfeed and was very much looking forward to it. Just like carrying him in the womb, it was something I could do for my baby that no one else could. Out he came into the world, and unfortunately breastfeeding did not come naturally for either of is. Challenging is putting it lightly. This poor little guy against my monumentally massive mammaries. He never stood a chance!! But I was so gung-ho on breastfeeding I stood my ground and did not supplement with formula even though 2 doctors recommended it. No, he didn't show much interest in feeding the first week and yes, he lost 10% of his body weight (which is normal!). Yes, my "tig ol' bitties" were cracked and crusted and the 1st 10 seconds of each feed was toe-curling excruciating pain. But we persevered, he gained his weight back at record speed and is now at 85th percentile for weight, and now we've got feeding time down to a science! It's crazy to look back and remember what a struggle it was, sometimes I'd be in tears at 3 in the morning because I couldn't get him on and he'd be shaking his head back and forth screaming like "WHERE IS MY MILK DAMNIT!?!?" Poor guy!

Having gone through all of that, I can totally understand why some mothers feel it's just too painful and frustrating and give up quickly. There is such pressure now a days that "breast is best", and it's pretty undeniable that it is, but I wouldn't go so far as to say it's SO MUCH BETTER that you should forgo your sanity to make it happen. There is so much judgement in the mommy world, and we should try to understand everyone has a different parenting style and is doing what's best for their family. Whether to breastfeed or formula feed is definitely a choice every mother has to make for herself, and there seem to be so many reasons why a mother might choose to formula feed....

As I mentioned above, the pain and difficulty of breastfeeding may turn a mom to the bottle (vodka bottle, haha!). Some people say women formula feed out of convenience. I'd say breastfeeding is much more convenient!! There's no heating up of water, no bottles to sterilize, just whip out the boob and go! Though, if you're shy about breastfeeding in public, or if you have to go back to work, yes, I will 100% agree that formula feeding is MUCH more convenient in those cases!! The idea of pumping and toting around my milk at work was one of the factors that led me to just outright quit work! Some women really want to breastfeed but their baby just won't latch or they don't have enough milk. In this case, I think many women give up too quickly. There are tons of great lactation consultants out there who can counsel you on diet, position, schedules, etc. Of course, in some cases there is no way around it and you just won't be able to provide for baby in that way, and that really sucks, but you move on. I'm very very thankful that I've had no issues with supply and while I'm dying to shed these final 10-15 pounds of baby weight, I am terrified that dieting or exercising too much will decrease my supply.

Long story short, don't look at a mom and come to some grand conclusion that she is lazy and irresponsible just because she is formula feeding. And don't look at a mom breastfeeding on a bench at the mall and think that she's some crunchy granola hippy trying to make everyone around her uncomfortable. Both of these mamas are doing what they gotta do to provide for their child in the best way that they can. And good for them!!

Overnight we went from being carefree DINKS (dual income no kids) to 3 on 1 salary. My husband and I have always been penny-pinchers, but have never had to even think about a budget, til now. There are a ton of things you want to buy for your growing family, but there is very little that your newborn actually NEEDS. So that is the first thing to really consider when trying to budget for baby! With that in mind, here are some things that have helped us not break the bank bringing baby into the world:

1) Hand Me Downs
This is not the time to stick your nose up in the air and say that baby will have all the best brand spanking new items from the poshest of brands. If you have a friend or relative offering you stuff, TAKE IT! Babies and kids grow out of stuff so fast, you'd be amazed what great shape clothing is in even after being handed down a few times! Same goes for toys, furniture, etc. You'll want to make sure the item hasn't been recalled or isn't in compliance with new safety regulations, and you should probably cough up the dough for a new baby mattress, and car seat (if it's older than 7 years or if it's been in any accidents, do NOT take a used one!), but other than that all other items seem fair game!

2) Craigslist
If you don't know about Craigslist, you have been living under a rock. It's amazing the deals you can find!! Be careful about fraud, be wary about going to someone's house alone especially if you haven't spoken on the phone, and be careful to inspect for bedbugs!! Other than that, go nuts!! We got an awesome Babyletto Mercer crib delivered to our door for $75 (new is well over $300). This is also a great place to sell (or give away) your own stuff!

3) Ebay
See number 2 about the living under a rock thing. Ebay can be great if you like the whole auction thing. You can get some great deals on new or used items, and sell them when you're done with them! Hoorah!

4) Online Shopping
Amazon and Diapers.com both have great prices and offer discounts with diaper subscription services (like 5% or so off if you place an on-going order), and free shipping over a certain amount.

4) Discount Stores
Marshall's, TJMaxx, Century 21, Burlington Coat Factory, Target, Walmart... to name a few!!

5) Swaps
Talk to friends and find local swaps. Usually their is an entry fee to the event and you bring items you no longer need and go "shopping" around the swap and pick up items you want. If your area doesn't have a swap, maybe you can organize one!

Finally, when you're thinking about your budget and how will you ever buy XYZ to keep your baby happy, why don't you take a moment to think about how little babies actually NEED. Sure the exersaucer with all the bells and whistles looks super fun, but perhaps your wallet or your micro-home won't allow it. Don't feel bad, not having every toy under the sun will not make you a bad parent and will not negatively effect your little one! They need loving attention, they need nutrition, and they need a safe place to nod off. If you haven't seen the documentary Babies, it's a great one, showcasing families raising their baby through the first year in Japan, America, Mongolia, and Africa.

OK, you know all those public service announcement for young gays, or kids being bullied? Celebrities and non-celebrities alike talk about how it might suck now, but eventually your life will be awesome so you just gotta persevere. Well, this is that, except for new moms!! Dedicated to my friend and new mommy of 79 hours (give or take), Angela!

New moms out there, I know you love your new bundle of joy more than life itself and words can't describe the overwhelming amount of love you have for him or her. But you can admit it. Despite all of that love and that amazing tiny gorgeous creature you now have, you kinda feel like shit! But don't worry, IT GETS BETTER!!

You are one exhausted haven't-slept-for-more-than-2-hours-straight-in-weeks zombie of a mommy. Sometimes when your little one wakes you up to feed you feel like rolling over and covering your head with your pillow. Don't worry... IT GETS BETTER!! Those stretches of unbroken sleep will get longer and longer and within a few months you should be up to a glorious 8-9 hours of unbroken night time sleep. OH THE JOY!!! And when you do wake up to feed your little one after that scrumptiously sound slumber, you'll be like "OMG I missed you!!" *snuggle*

So, your nipples are sore, cracked, bleeding, crusted over... what other disgusting words can I use to describe the monstrosities that have taken over what used to be your magnificent rack!? They no longer belong to you or your husband, they are the sole property of your little one, who frankly doesn't care that they are sore, cracked, bleeding, or crusted over. Baby wants milk and will get it when and where he wants it!! Grabbing, twisting, chomping, pulling - it's all fair game for baby and poor mommy has to just suffer through. Don't worry... IT GETS BETTER!! If you have it in the budget for a lactation consultant (a few hundred bucks per visit) - it's probably worth it in the first few days or weeks to make sure you've got position and latch right. If it's not in the budget, make sure you do research in books and online, cuz if the latch is wrong it will hurt more, can cause damage, and might interfere with baby getting enough milk and thus cause trouble with establishing a good milk supply. But, assuming everything is fine in those departments, you probably still have extremely sore nipples and huge painful boobs. Am I right? But as your nipples toughen up, they will become less and less sore and the cracking and scabbing and grossness will go away. Might take a month or 2, but trust me, they won't look like that for the duration of your nursing period!! And as you get into a regular feeding schedule, the engorgement will ease off and you will no longer require Lamaze breathing to get you through the pain of taking your bra on and off, and the droplets from the shower will no longer make you wince! They may blow up occasionally if your little one sleeps longer than usual, but it's quickly resolved after he wakes up and chugs away! Or you can always express some in the shower or into the sink!

Winded just going up one flight of stairs? Can't stand for more than a few minutes or can't sit down without a donut pillow? Feel like your insides are going to come out and your ass is going to explode when it's time to "drop the kids off at the pool"?? Don't worry... IT GETS BETTER!! Your body went to hell and back carrying your child and especially pushing him out into this world. You can't expect everything to just sky rocket back to normal the next day. God, it'd be nice, but just doesn't happen unfortunately. It takes time. LOTS of time! And lots of Kegels. Eventually you'll no longer be terrified of pooping, blowing your nose, coughing, sneezing, or doing the deed with your hubby. By your 6-week check up you should be more or less back to normal, and those first few weeks are rough so take it slow. They're serious when they say don't do much the first 2 weeks. So don't!! But there are a lot of things out there to help when it comes to the bathroom business - stool softeners (or just extra fiber & water), squirt bottles, and witch hazel pads are all awesome so give them a try!

Your baby is crying and crying and you're going through the mental checklist (hungry? needs to burp? dirty diaper? too hot/cold? sleepy?) and nothing is helping. Out of frustration and exhaustion and feeling like you're the worst mother who can't comfort her own baby, you start crying, too. Oh yikes. To hell in a hand basket. Don't worry... IT GETS BETTER!! Before you know it, you'll know what your baby needs before he even gets around to crying! And when he does cry, you'll know why and exactly what to do to fix it (well, most of the time). But, it takes a while to get to know your baby, so give it time, it will come! In the meantime, get "Happiest Baby on the Block" dvd and/or book. The techniques are AMAZING!!! Like, seriously. Get it!! Study it!! LIVE IT!!!

DISCLAIMER: If you have any thoughts about hurting your baby or yourself, please seek professional help. While I'm trying to be both helpful and humorous with my IT GETS BETTER post, postpartum depression is no laughing matter!

• If you need immediate help, please call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

• If you are looking for pregnancy or postpartum support and local resources, please call or email us: Call PSI Warmline (English & Spanish) 1-800-944-4PPD (4773)
Email [email protected]

I have quite a bit of child care experience under my belt. 10 years of baby sitting experience to be exact! Granted, that was 15 years ago.

When the nurse came into our room and asked if we'd changed our brand new baby's diaper yet, my husband and I looked at each other quizzically. Like, the thought hadn't even crossed our minds! Diaper?? Must have been nothing new for the nurse and she went right on ahead and did it herself as we both watched in awe. Awe turned to vehement disgust as that diaper unveiled the most atrocious contents one has ever seen. A big bad steaming pile of meconium!! I took a step back and the words were not even necessary. My body (and face) language said it all - I'm not touching that!! So she quickly cleaned it up and that was that!! The next diaper, my husband did with the nurse's help. I got it on video cuz he was just so darn cute and proud to be changing his very first diaper!! (This novelty soon wore off, for sure!).

Once at home, I quickly adapted a system whereas I put the new diaper down under him before I undid the first diaper. Then I open up old diaper, and quickly cover his wee-wee with a wipe, and use the old diaper to wipe away any major poop. Then I wipe him clean and strap him in the new diaper. Usually, a simple process. However, the first couple of weeks gave us many a diaper mishaps. There were several instances where I would blow through 3 diapers in one changing!! I just didn't have the timing right, and I would change him mid-poop apparently! This not only ended with many wasted diapers, but also with poop on my hands, my arms, all over the changing table, and on the neighboring walls, ughhhhhhhhhhhh!! Now I've gotten to know his grunts and muscle contractions so I tend to know when he's still working on something, and I wait it out ^_^

We also had drama due to the actual diapers. We came home with a starter pack of Pampers Swaddlers complements of the hospital. These were great! Then, I found a sale on Huggies and got those next. But he had MAJOR leakage around his legs EVERY TIME he pooped!! You couldn't lay him anywhere without him leaving behind some breastmilky poopy goo! YUCK! We quickly switched back to Pampers which have been great and we've gone from Newborn, to size one, to size two, and are about to switch to size 3. But Pampers are quite pricey. So I'm gonna try Luvs when we switch to size 3. They're sooooo much cheaper, I just hope they work for him!

Talking to my mommy (and daddy) friends, it seems quite common that one brand will work great for one baby and terrible for another. And one brand will work fine in one size, but the next size is no good. Unfortunately, the smallest packs of diapers sold are generally about 40-60 diapers, and while my mother argues you could just return them if they don't work, most people I know wouldn't be comfortable returning an opened and partially used box of diapers. So, why don't they sell smaller sample packs?? It really would be to their benefit. People could try out a new brand, and they'd switch if they like it! They sell small packs of wipes (for travel), so why not diapers?? Hmmmmm... you'll see more on this later - stay posted!!!

Three years ago I today we tied the knot, got hitched, jumped the broom, or whatever you like to call it! I walked down the virgin road (that's what they call the aisle in Japan!! HA!!) in Hawaii of all places!! I'd never been there before, but it seemed like the perfect romantic and beautiful halfway meeting ground for our family and friends to join from America and Japan (as well as from Canada, Australia, and England). And it was!! It was such an amazing experience, one that I hope I will never forget!! Thank goodness we have the photos and videos to help us relive it anytime we want!

For a regular run of the mill couple, a destination wedding can be special and exciting, but for an international couple with families on opposite sides of the globe, I think there can't be anything better suited!! Rather than a one day thing, we stretched it into a long weekend full of events so everyone could meet and get acquainted and have fun! I did all of the planning from my computer in Japan, and it was a lot of work but definitely not impossible and worth the TONS of money we saved by not hiring a coordinator! Also saved a bunch by buying my dress used online! I found the style and size I wanted at David's Bridal during a visit home to the States, then searched high and low and got a second hand one online for all of $200 (new was about $900)!! To make matters even sweeter, I re-sold it after my wedding and made a slight profit!!

I got a room block and booked the wedding reception at the Hilton Hawaiian Village, and the wedding ceremony at the Ocean Crystal Chapel on the grounds of the Hilton. I considered a beach wedding but knew I'd be one ball of stress worrying about the weather!! I fell in love with the chapel the moment I saw it on the internet, and booked everything else at the Hilton because 1) it's beautiful and 2) we wouldn't have to worry about getting everyone to and fro on the wedding day.

One of the first nights, we had our two immediate families meet over dinner. The next day we hosted the entire group (about 30 guests) on a charter bus tour of the main island. We went to the Dole Pineapple Plantation, cute North Shore town of Haleiwa, Laniakea (Turtle Beach), Sunset Beach, the Shrimp Fields and lunch at a Shrimp Shack, Kualoa Park, and Pali Lookout. It was an awesome tour and I got a guide for the bus that was Japanese-English bilingual which was sooooo helpful! That night we had the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner at Tiki's Grill & Bar - which was YUM-O and with a very fun and festive Hawaiian atmosphere. Everyone got a commemorative t-shirt and wore them for a couple of pictures which was fun! All were free and did their own thing the morning of the wedding, and the ceremony started in the afternoon followed by the reception, all at the Hilton. We got a bilingual non-denominational minister and a bilingual MC who ended up being a HUGE help and took charge of many things a coordinator would have!! While we were pretty good with budgeting, we were still able to get all the important stuff like photographer and videographer (Fisheye), DJ, yummy cake and food and BOOOOOOZ (no choice with those last 3 - Hilton catered - was delish but a pretty penny!!). The morning after we all went for brunch at Shore Birds and then everyone flew off to their respective homes across the globe and Ryoji and I jumped off to the Big Island for our hot and steamy honeymoon.

Bish bash bosh - we were married, our families and friends met and loved each other, and we all just had the best most amazing vacation of a lifetime!! I HIGHLY recommend this kind of wedding, especially if you have loved ones spread out all around. But you have to be comfortable with the fact that certain people (i.e. elderly grandparents, friends with tight budgets or tough work schedules, about-to-pop preggos, etc) won't be able to join. Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions regarding your destination wedding!! I'm very proud with how ours turned out, and didn't even come close to breaking the bank, thank god!!

Little Kenzo was born with 100% Japanese eyes. No crease or double eyelid or whatever you call it. They were just like daddy's and gorgeous! Fast forward 2 months and overnight he developed the double lid... in ONE EYE!! From the start, he'd get it in both eyes when he was super tired, but apparently after 2 months his left eye just decided it wanted to be different and the crease stuck. So he's totally gotten this Victor-Victoria thing going on where the left half of his face is Asian and the right half is Western. Hmph. He's still a cutie but I hope one of his eyes will change at some point so they'll go back to matching!

With a mommy and daddy of two different races (even if you're the same race!), it is really quite fascinating to see how the genetics play out with your children. While pregnant, everyone says "Oh, mixed babies are the cutest! Your baby will be gorgeous!!!" and we hoped so but deep down you really do worry. What if he gets Ryoji's tiny eyes and my huge nose? What if he gets my pasty complexion and Ryoji's features and looks funky like a Japanese albino (no offense to Japanese albinos!!). We were pretty certain he would have brown eyes, because let's face it, there is no one with a recessive blue gene in Ryoji's family tree! But, light brown or dark brown, who knows! And green or grey or hazel, how do those happen?

Of course we are a wee bit biased but despite the mis-matched eyelids, we consider our little Kenzo kawaiiiiiiiiii (cute)!

For the first month or two of my son's life, life as I knew it kind of stopped. Except for running short errands and the 10 days my in-laws came to visit from Japan, we really didn't leave the house! Sleep deprived - check. Scared of him crying in public and me not being able to settle him down - check. Scared of him getting too cold in the blustery weather - check. Terrified to breastfeed in public - check! The last thing on my mind was trying to go out and meet up with old friends, or seek out new friends. I was pretty darn content to hang at home with my little one! When I needed advice or support, I turned to my family via e-mail and Skype, and the Internet's many forums for moms. While pregnant, I had joined my due date month groups at What to Expect and Mothering, and as everyone in those groups is at the same stage as me and Kenzo, it's been a great place to be involved (or just lurk)!

But getting into his third month, I got him on a schedule and things really turned around. We are both getting plenty of sleep, I *usually* know why he's crying and how to calm him, I've breastfed in public and while I don't like it I can't use it as an excuse to stay home anymore. And daytime TV is really getting old... So, Kenzo and I wanted to get out of the house more but didn't know any moms and babies in the neighborhood! I reached out far and low through the above mentioned sites as well as Cafe Mom, and found a few new moms in Bay Ridge. We had a little play date and I decided to make a Facebook group ("Bay Ridge Baby Mamas") and in just a couple of weeks it's grown to 21 members! We've met for our local library's "Babies & Books" and took a stroll to the park and nearby pier. It's nice because the kids are various ages so moms with older ones can give us with younger ones great advice. Kenzo's not really interacting with others just yet, but soon he will be and it'll be nice to have such a fun group of friends to play with! Just yesterday, Kenzo got a free Bumbo chair from one of the moms, yay!

So, I couldn't be more thrilled to have met such a wonderful group of moms in our neighborhood, and as beautiful spring weather approaches I'm really looking forward to getting out and about more, exploring the area with Kenzo while chatting with new friends, and burning off this pesky baby weight! ^_^

As a stay at home mom who's been with our baby 24/7 for 3 months now, I've really gotten to know him pretty darn well. I know his schedule, like if it's getting close to 1.5 hours after a daytime feeding he's gonna get fussy if not put down for a nap. I usually know by the sounds coming from his crib if he's awake and ready to get up, awake and needing help to go back to sleep, or still sound asleep and to be ignored. These are the nuances any caretaker would pick up on after being with a child day in and day out. Even so, it is a bit of an ego trip when daddy has no clue why little Kenzo is crying and asks me for help!

Alas I can't be our baby's one and only. A little boy needs his daddy! But what to do when daddy is Japanese working for a Japanese company and thus not home much? We haven't gotten it all figured out, but here are some things that I think make all of us feel a little better...

BEDTIME: I've adjusted Kenzo's bed time to be pretty late, usually about 10 or 10:30 PM. That way, daddy can have about 30-60 minutes quality time with Kenzo after he gets home from work and has dinner.

E-MAILING PHOTOS: I try to email a photo to daddy's phone whenever Kenzo is doing something especially cute or silly. Like when he's passed out in a hilarious position, when he accomplishes something new like sucking his thumb, or when he has an epic blowout soaking the entire back of his shirt! haha!!

SKYPE/PHONE: When daddy goes on a business trip, we try to talk on the phone at least once a day, and skype if our schedules will allow it. Kenzo loves to see daddy on Skype, not sure if he knows that's daddy, but he definitely is entertained and will smile. If it's just the phone, I put it on speaker phone so Kenzo can hear daddy and sometimes he'll "talk" to daddy, which is adorable!

When daddy is home at night or on the weekends, I try to get him involved in the daily tasks such as changing diapers, changing clothes, tummy time, putting him down for a nap, etc. Even though these are everyday tasks for me, I hope they can be special for him and he can feel involved and that he is part of the team! And I do my best not to tell him how to do something or chastise him for doing something "wrong"