As I've mentioned before, our apartment doesn't have air conditioning. It's not so bad, even in this heat wave, but no matter the temperature we have to escape every once in a while. Especially when Kenzo is cranky and not napping. Distraction is key and the best kind of distraction for him is a different environment! If it's nice outside we'll take a walk, come home, go to the grocery store, come home, go to the park, come home, etc etc. Anything to break up the day. But it's too hot for those lovely adventures so I thought I'd give the library a shot. We go there every Monday and Wednesday for their free Babies & Books classes, and recently we've been popping in to get those board baby books as we only have about 10 at home and I was soooooooooooo tired of reading them over and over again! Now we go about twice a week and get about 10 each time. Not sure Kenzo cares about it but I'm all excited to read the different stories!! Some are so fun and cute, others are a joke - like really, how did this get published? I could have come up with something more interesting! haha! I digress. Where I was going with this is that I took Kenzo to the lil' kids area of the library today to just hang out for the first time. They have a special room that is semi-sound proofed with a door that shuts. I brought a big blanket for him to sit on since the carpet in there is pretty cruddy (they don't have a shoes off policy, boo!!). I brought 5 squeezy blocks and a couple of other toys. There were a couple of other families in there reading and I sat him down and started stacking his blocks for him and letting him knock them over. There was a little boy walking around the room shoving crackers in his mouth, making a terrible mess on himself and the floor all over the room. Cue disapproving mom face. *SMH* I think he was with his nanny, but I didn't call her that, remembering all the responses I got from yesterday's post saying people thought they were a nanny to their baby simply because their skin tones didn't quite match. But not only was this woman a completely different complexion but if she was related she was his grandmother if anything. But anyway, she was totally ignoring him. Poor guy. He starts inching his way closer and closer to the fun action going on between me and Kenzo and our blocks. Sure enough he is finally brazen enough to join us and start STEALING MY BABY'S BLOCKS, with his crumb covered hands no less. I had been listening out for any sort of sniffle or cough the second he started making his way toward us, so I'm pretty sure we're in the clear there. But crumbs on the blocks Kenzo sucks on. He hasn't had solids yet, who knows what kinda allergies he has yet. CUE ANXIOUS MOM FREAKING OUT. lol
Anyway, I just pushed my worries to the back of my mind and fostered a sharing playful environment between the two of them. Showing them they could stack and knock over the blocks together, and even enjoying the advanced level of play this 2.5 year old had (for example asking him what animal was on each block and what sound it made). The whole time his nanny or grandma or whoever was in the corner of the room not even attempting to join or monitor. That's probably the part I have the most problem with. Until today, Kenzo really hadn't socialized directly with anyone outside of his itty bitty baby cohort, and I liked it that way. I'm a bit uncomfortable with him playing with older kids, because of germs and especially if I'm the only one around to mediate - I can't keep Kenzo from scratching the other kid AND keep the other kid from throwing a toy at Kenzo's head, ya know? Oh, the joy I have to look forward to when Kenzo has a baby brother or sister (in a few years folks, don't get any ideas here!!). On the other hand, playing with older kids is probably good for his development, not to mention it's downright entertaining for him to just observe them and their crazy antics. What do you think? Do you keep your little ones playing with others their own age? Do they prefer playing with older or younger kids?
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My husband is Japanese and I'm your standard run of the mill white American. As soon as we got pregnant, everyone was all "You are gonna have the cutest baby EVER!!!" which was fun to hear (a million times!) but how do you respond to that? "Thanks"? "I hope so"? We were riddled with a mixture of curiosity and anxiety over what our lil' munchkin would look like. Would he get my husband's teeny tiny eyes and my huge nose? Would he look albino with my pasty complexion and my husband's Asian features? Other than the obvious fears of the child being born with a major physical or mental disability, my biggest 100% superficial and selfish worry was that our baby would look 100% Asian and people would think he was adopted. Well, I definitely think he looks mixed, a perfect mix if you ask me, but my previous fear came to fruition a couple of days ago for the first time. I was with Kenzo at the local bagel shop and a lady (she was Asian, not sure from where) is looking between him and me quizzically, then says to me out of the blue and all matter of factly "He looks Asian". So many creative and fun ways I could have responded. But she caught me completely off guard!! I replied, "Ah, haha, yes, well his father is Japanese". OK, not so unusual... I've had several strangers ask me if his daddy was Asian - mostly people who have a child or grandchild who is half white half Asian - I guess there is a certain happa / haafu / half / mixed / whatever you wanna call it "look". But the kicker is how she responded... "Oh, I thought you adopted him from China". Agh. There it is. Why this offended me so much I do not know. I see nothing wrong with adopting, and nothing wrong with Chinese people, and nothing wrong with adopting a child from China... but the fact is I did NOT adopt a child from China, nor does my child have anything to do with China. He is half JAPANESE and half ME and didn't yo mama teach you if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all??? Telling someone their child looks adopted is not especially nice. Grrrr... On a lighter note, have you ever taken the All Looks Same exam? They show you various Asian faces and you guess if they're Japanese, Chinese, Korean, etc. You will fail. I promise! It's crazy when you don't have fashion or accent to take into account... even Asians fail this exam!
First of all, a big HAPPY HALF BIRTHDAY to my little man!! I can't believe just 6 months ago I was enduring the biggest most horrendous pain of my life and gifted with the biggest joy of my life!! What a mixed bag of emotions the birthing day is!! I'd like to take a moment to reflect on some of the ups and downs of the last 6 months...
Downs: Lack of sleep, lack of free time (I miss my bazillion TV shows I was addicted to!), lack of alone time with hubby, extreme frustration during the witching hour (evening time when Kenzo's at his crankiest), lack of money (we haven't really dipped into our savings but I do our financials at the end of each month and I miss seeing it actually go UP - missing the dual income). Ups: Seeing Kenzo's constant development both physically and emotionally, his laughs and giggles and smiles, all my awesome new mama friends, juggling baby and Miny Moe and this blog and Mommy Nearest is a struggle but really fulfilling, feeling more a part of society (we go to the weekly library classes, strangers say hello on the street, I'm active in the local community through FB's Bay Ridge Parents, Bay Ridge Baby Mamas, and Bay Ridge Swappies). Best of Times: * Witnessing Kenzo roll over for the first time - I screamed SO LOUD!!! * Tickle time - depending on his mood he's really ticklish on his tummy, armpits, and inner thighs. His laughter is contagious and we both go nuts for a good 10 minutes! * Introducing Kenzo to family and friends for the first time, I feel like such a proud mommy! * Finally making the decision to quit my job and not go back after maternity leave - best decision ever and such a relief once it was finally made! Worst of Times: * Diaper blowouts and poo explosions - all over his back, on my hands, on the wall... ick!!! * Screaming the ENTIRE drive back from NJ after hubby's basketball game. Eventually mama was crying too! * Trip to the ER at 4 days postpartum (for bilirubin check) - what a nightmare and so scary! * Physically for me, the whole 1st 2 weeks postpartum, yuck yuck ouch ouch no fun at all!!
These first 6 months with Kenzo have flown by, I can't even believe it!! Sometimes I wish it'd slow down - he's growing so fast and I feel like if I blink he's going to be graduating high school and leaving us >_< But at the same time, it's so amazing watching him grow and change and learn new things! I guess we just have to savor each moment, take tons of photos and videos, and have another baby when this baby is no longer a baby! haha!!
So how about you?? What have been your ups and downs as a new mom? You've heard of "Throw Mama from the Train"? Well, today it was "Throw Sofie from the Stroller". I was hustling home from the grocery store cuz they sky was looking ominous. All of a sudden a lady coming the opposite direction on the sidewalk said "Look out, over there dear". Huh?? I looked where she was pointing. Light years away on the other side of the sidewalk was our little Giraffe Sofie. I looked down at Kenzo in the stroller who was innocently manhandling his little toes in an upside down rolly polly position. Had he seriously just hurled his little Sofie 5 feet away? And without me even noticing?? Wow! Time for this guy to be signed up for little league!!
So, he's got a great arm. In other bodily news - his bottom teeth are seriously about to sprout! And the halo sleep sack success was a fluke... today no such luck. He started flipping in it, and once he realized he could do that, it was all over. Last 2 naps were a no go - wouldn't stop crying and every few minutes when I'd pop in to calm him down he was on his tummy, stuck, ughhhhhhhhhhhh.... I give up on figuring it out and I'll just call it teething... Remember my baby's sleep strike? He's been screaming when being put down for a nap for about 2 weeks now, since we went to my parent's house in North Carolina. Sometimes he will just skip a nap altogether - being completely soothed and calm when I'm in the room and hysterically screaming the second I leave, eventually I give up and wait a couple of hours to try again. Sometimes he'd wake up several times a night, doing acrobatics in his crib, kicking the rail, etc. Was driving me crazy!! He was exhausted and cranky and I felt so bad for him, and myself! Everyone said, "Oh yes, he's teething!". But he doesn't show any kind of pain when he's awake. Sure he has his hands in his mouth 24/7 and leaves a trail of drool wherever he goes, but didn't really seem to be having any sort of discomfort. Just didn't want to go to sleep!
So, I started racking my brain... What happened around the time that we went to North Carolina??? The answer??? The weather turned warmer and we did away with his Halo Sleep Sack! Could that be it??? Let's see! It got cooler and I decided to put him down for his nap in the sleep sack (swaddled with arms out as we'd been doing since he was 4 months). You know what? It was lights out without a peep and he slept for a good hour and a half without moving an inch. WHAT?!?! This has to be a coincidence!! So, I used the sleep sack for the rest of his naps, and bed time, and the next day's naps and bedtime.... sweet sweet glorious calm baby is back. Do we have sleep-crutch on our hands? Quite possibly. Do I care?? HELL NO!!! If this helps my little one get the sound sleep he so desperately (and I so desperately) needs, so be it!! Bring on the sleep sack!!! If anyone recommends a light weight one that still swaddles but is a very thin breathable material - I'm all ears!! I don't think the one we're using will work when the sweltering heat comes back... Oh my god oh my god oh my god what is UP with my child recently?!?!?!?! This dude will just not sleep. He's obviously tired: rubbing his red-rimmed eyes, yawning, fussy. But the second I put him down in his crib it's hysterical crying and screaming. I give him a minute to find his thumb and sooth himself (or a few minutes if I've lost it and need some time to deal with my frustration - as we were directed to do by the nurse who made us sign a waiver saying she told us about "shaken baby syndrome" before being discharged with him after his birth). But it's like all of a sudden he forgot about his thumb, which he used to love and it would calm him down in all of 2 seconds!! My sweet little baby who used to go down for a nap all smiley is now a ferocious best determined to NEVER SLEEP AGAIN!!!
It started when we went down to visit my family in Charlotte a couple of weeks ago, but has been getting progressively worse. And recently the sleep strike has extended into the night. Last night he woke me up 3 times because he had flipped to his tummy and couldn't flip back, twice because he had gotten his feet stuck between the rails of the crib, and another 2-3 times because he was kicking the side of the crib so hard I was scared he might bust the rail off and fall onto the floor (is this one of those unwarranted mom worries, or can it really happen??)!! Finally I couldn't take it and just brought him into bed with me. Daddy is out of town, so there was plenty of space thank goodness. Aghhhh this has got to be some sort of phase he's transitioning through, right? Teething perhaps? But he doesn't seem to be in pain - it seems to be completely emotional. I guess he's getting to that magical point around 6 months where he's developing object permanence and self-awareness and... MANIPULATION!!! I don't want to create a habit where I break down and nurse him back to sleep every time. But I don't want to cause him (and me) undue trauma by just letting him scream his little head off. Meanwhile, I just can't get the title of that one hilariously inappropriate children's book read by Samuel L. Jackson out of my head: "Go the F*K to Sleep!!!" Advice? Support?? Valium??? I read something a few weeks ago about various ways to comfort your child while getting shots. It had never occurred to me that I could hold my little one while someone is jabbing a needle into his thigh! The doctor always just said to put the baby on the table and who am I to question them (I'm chuckling as I write this cuz if you know me, I question just about everything, haha!).
Kenzo had his slightly delayed 5 month checkup today since we were out of town when he really should have gone. But that's beside the point. I wanted to avoid the negativity that arose from our last visit with she-who-shall-not-be-named so I went ahead and requested a specific doctor rather than saying "Oh, whoever is available". I'm not saying she's a bad doctor whatsoever, and she's a lovely person, we're just not exactly on the same page regarding my baby, and you should really really be on the same page with your pediatrician!! So, we saw Dr. Raptis this time as we've seen him once before and liked him, and a lot of our friends recommended him as well. When he asked me if I'd started Kenzo on solids yet, I said "No" and he responded "Well, if you don't mind..." and I started cringing thinking he was going to try to get us to start solids. But he kept going "...I really prefer to wait until 6 months" and I let out a huge sigh of relief and shouted "ME TOOOO!!!!!" ^_^ And he said "Oh, good! We're on the same page then!" Oh thank goodness. Dr. Raptis did the full exam and announced Kenzo's 75th percentile for weight and 90th percentile for height - way to go dude! I told him Kenzo's been rubbing his left ear, especially while nursing, but after inspection he said it looks good and that's often a sign of teething and he let me see Kenzo's lower gum with the light shone on it, and low and behold, two big lumps of teeth are working their way up. Next was time for shots, which Doc told Kenzo are just 2 little mosquito bites - how cute! I asked if I could hold the baby and he said "Of course!!" and showed me the best position, which was him just sitting on my lap. I cuddled his arms in close to his body so he couldn't grab at the syringe. In went the shot on the right leg, just a little whimper. So I started singing one of our songs from library class we go to. In goes the shot on the left leg. He starts to cry a little, I ramp up my singing. Doc slaps on the bandaids and says we're done. I scoop Kenzo up and within 5 seconds he's completely settled down and content. O.M.G. I can't believe I never tried this cuddling thing during shots before! I feel like such a failure of a mom - letting my little one lay on the table being jabbed at, turning beat red and hysterically crying. My poor little guy!!! Anyone out there reading this - please give cuddles and singing a try at your next check-up / vaccinations!!! It makes a world of difference, for your little one and you!! To those of you who aren't in the know yet (and I wasn't until very recently!), Mommy Nearest is a recently launched FREE mobile app that allows parents to access all kinds of child-related resources throughout New York City (with other cities coming soon). Yes, there IS an app for that ^_^ With Mommy Nearest, you’ll be able to find things like the closest kid-friendly restaurants that have high chairs, the nearest parks and playgrounds, broken down by amenities and even the best places to change a diaper. In many situations, the app can be a true lifesaver. You can download it now for free by clicking here.
Being a new mom and having started the Bay Ridge Baby Mamas Facebook group a couple months ago, I thought wow, this is right up my alley! Other mamas are always asking me which restaurants won't give their screaming toddler the evil eye, where they can find a private place to nurse their little one while out shopping, where is a changing table or toilet that doesn't give you the heebee jeebies... Without further ado, I have some exciting news!! Mommy Nearest has chosen me as an “Expert Mom”. As a Mommy Nearest Expert Mom, I will be chronicling my experiences using the app and trying out some new places. You can keep tabs on my adventure by reading this blog or by going to the Mommy Nearest blog at blog.mommynearest.com, where you'll find entries by all of the awesome Expert Moms!! You might be wondering why I was chosen as a Mommy Nearest Expert Mom. Well, duh - I'm awesome like that! *wink wink* Anyway, I will have a lot more to share about my experiences in the coming weeks, so keep checking back. In the meantime, definitely check out the Mommy Nearest app, available for download for both iPhones and Android devices for FREE (we do love us some free stuff!!). This is day 7 of my little one's poop strike and he has FINALLY gone. Somewhat. But not nearly a week's worth of poo. What is going on in that little belly of his? Until he was about 2 months old, he went ALL. THE. TIME! Seriously, pretty much every diaper had some lovely present waiting for me. After about 2 months he started consolidating and by around 3 months he was down to once a day. Since then, he's only had one stint of not going, which only lasted 3 days. Also since then, he's been holding his pee all night, like 12 hours, and he's only pooped in our house. Seriously. And it's not like we're never going out. We go out for several hours almost every day, at different times of day. I don't know if it's coincidence, or if he is subconsciously holding it til we get home. It's weird stuff but of course I'm happy with it not having to deal with a blowout diaper in the middle of story time at the library! Except this not wanting to poo outside our house has become a bit of a problem now that we're down in North Carolina for 10 days. I was told that exclusively breastfed babies rarely get certifiably constipated because they digest breastmilk so well that there isn't really much left to poo out, and it's normal for them to go up to a week without pooing. But how can a baby who goes every morning all of a sudden not go for a week? My diet hasn't really changed. He hasn't seemed bloated or uncomfortable, but his farts have become TOXIC! Like, gas mask worthy! And coming out machine gun style. You hear it and smell it and are SO sure he's filled his diaper. You open it up and it's clean as a whistle. Dafuq dude??! Someone suggested me taking a stool softener, but I wasn't quite ready to use drugs as a remedy. Instead I ate 6 prunes, after which I wondered if it's just the fiber in prunes which makes you go. If that's the case, I doubt the beneficial effects would be passed on to baby. Hmmph. Someone else suggested using a rectal thermometer to get things going. I remembered the only time he had his temperature taken from the bum was when we went to the ER for his bilirubin testing when he was only 4 days old. Yes, thermometer up the butt worked wonders that time for sure. He exploded all over me and the lady taking his temp! She called it newborn's revenge. Ha! So, my mom dug out her ancient baby book (pic below) and to work she went. Kenzo didn't seem to notice whatsoever, which was a big relief to me, but there was no poo relief from the procedure unfortunately. This morning I heard him grunting and farting in his crib for a good 10 minutes. To my delight there was a bit of a result in his diaper when I finally pulled myself out of bed. But as I mentioned before, it wasn't nearly a week's worth. I'm hoping now that he's broken the seal it'll come out gradually today. The mother of all blowouts would seriously dampen a girl's day, and you can be sure I will be posting a picture if that is what we get! ^_^
Worried. Anxious. Stressed. Dubious. A thesaurus full of such words is how I felt leading up to my first flight solo with little one in tow. How did it actually go? Smooth. Swimmingly. A-OK!! Phew! The morning started off rather hellish though. I had 2 Miny Moe orders I had to drop off at the post office. I thought my flight was leaving at 2:30pm and I would have plenty of time in the morning. Then I checked the info... whoops... LANDING at 2:30, departing at 12:15! Taxi scheduled for 10am, post office opens at 9am and is a 30 minute walk from my apartment. OMG. Got back from the P.O. at 9:40 spectacularly sweaty and had to feed the baby... more sweat. Taxi comes, and despite my telling the dispatcher several times that I will have an INFANT who needs a rear-facing car seat for a YOUNG BABY, well, of course there was NO CARSEAT!!! $@#*&@#$ are you $#@^&*#@$ kidding me???!!!! Driver seemed sorry, it obviously wasn't his fault. He asked me what I wanted to do, and well, what could I do?? Out in Bay Ridge you can't exactly just haul a taxi with an infant car seat. So I said, well, f-ing drive carefully man!! And he did. Probably the safest taxi ride of my life!! I wasn't sure of the safest way to hold a baby in a car. Hadn't exactly researched that and probably should. I knew better than to put the seatbelt over both of us, but that's about it. I decided to put the seatbelt on myself and tie him in the carrier to myself over the seatbelt. This way he wouldn't fly about in an accident, though my chin might have cracked into his little head, so I kept my hand up there most of the ride. Got to the airport, checked in, waked to the security line and OMG it is like 200 people deep. Seriously. No exaggeration. Well, I really really wish I didn't have to pee really really bad. No bathroom to be seen and I just go ahead and get at the back of the line. I am thankful I didn't bring the stroller, this would have been extremely frustrating snaking through the narrow Disneyland-esque lines. Instead I had Kenzo wrapped up snuggly in his Mei Tai carrier, and had his diaper bag hooked on top of our carry-on suitcase. FYI I highly recommend this method as it left me with a free hand (or 2 if we weren't on the move) and I was very mobile and not weighed down with too much crap. A few minutes after waiting in line (I am living in NY but I will never say "waiting ON line" haha) a worker comes and scoops me and Kenzo up, walking past EVERYONE up to the wheelchair entrance and bam, we have cut the line shaving a good hour off of the process! Niiiiiiice. Next came the part I mostly dreaded. I thought I'd have to take Kenzo out of his carrier. Then I wouldn't have enough hands. Yikes. I asked the worker and HOOOORAY baby could stay in the carrier!! On top of that, I didn't have to pour the water out of my water bottle - he said "Well, that's for baby..." haha. Technically, I guess it is. If mama gets dehydrated, baby won't get enough milk. We shot through the metal detector and then I had my hands swabbed for chemicals. Interesting! Got to our gate, and wouldn't you know we're delayed. Keeps getting pushed back 15 minutes, 20 minutes, another 10 minutes... By the time we're ready to go it's been delayed a total of 2 hours. But in that time, Kenzo took a beautiful nap on my in his carrier: So boarding started with the typical "Passengers with small children needing extra time or assistance are welcomed to board first". I had debated whether to board first or last, thinking the less time cooped up in that tiny seat the better. But I went ahead and boarded first. I asked them if I could check my suitcase at the gate but they said we're not full so there is no need. I explained "But, well, I can't get it into the overhead bin" motioning at the baby strapped to my chest. So, I got my own little bell boy to assist me! He rolled the suitcase onto the plane and stowed it away for me - niiiiiiiiiiiice!! I sat down, and the flight attendant came over right away to say hello and explain where the infant life vests are and how to use the emergency oxygen mask on the baby (WHAT?? OMG! NO!!!). The rest of the passengers boarded and pretty soon the flight attendant came back to explain that there are a lot of empty seats and do I want to move somewhere more spacious. Yes please!! I moved back a few rows so that the 10 seats surrounding us were empty. Wow! This is awesome!! No pervy perves to worry about peeking under my nursing cover! Kenzo stayed awake the whole flight. I nursed him while taxiing. He had no issues during the ascent. We played and sang songs (thank god for my 3x a week library babies and books classes - I had quite a repertoire of songs to work with during our 90 minute flight!!). I nursed him again during the descent and he didn't seem to have any pain whatsoever. There was a magnetic changing table in the bathroom, but thankfully we didn't need to use that. And there we were, safe and sound in Charlotte and picked up by my own mama. One more hitch to work through though... she'd borrowed a car seat from my aunt and it seriously took us 15 minutes to figure out how to tighten the straps! haha!! Despite what you may be thinking, neither of us are not blonde ^_^ That sums up my first solo flight with Kenzo (5 months). In case you have your own trip coming up, be prepared - make sue you know the policies of the airline (ours required no ID for the baby, nor a letter from daddy saying we weren't abducting the baby - of course both are required for int'l travel), bring enough toys, diapers, food, etc for double your estimated trip time - you never know when delays will happen!! Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, right?? |
About ME:I'm a NYC metro area mom blogger living in NJ with my Japanese husband & our 3 kids (twins plus 1), focusing on fun and honest product and travel reviews, saving moms time finding the best for their families! Find what you need in the menu bar or search section above! Categories
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