Rockin' the New Mom Style

The first postpartum month was rough. I think I showered about once a week. Why you ask? Exhausted, check. Massive leakage from top and bottom that made being nude a nuisance, check. Did I mention exhausted??? I think I stepped up the showers to twice a week during the 2nd month, and then up to 3 times a week the 3rd month. Then, I met my mommy friends and actually started getting out of the house on a regular basis, which forced me to pull it together... somewhat...

So, here is the "SAHM with a New Baby" Style I've been sporting as of lately:

1) Disproportionally tan hands with the to half of fingers still rather pale and a wedding ring tan line, from strollering around the neighborhood endless hours a week. Why no sunblock? Because little one likes to suck on my hands and fingers, and I don't want him ingesting my sunblock. And not sure how much of those chemicals would end up in my milk. And, I'm a secret sun worshiper - shhhhh don't tell my sister! And as for the nails, forget the manicure. Gotta keep these bad boys trimmed short or else I accidentally scratch the bejeezus out of my poor boy when changing his clothes or diaper. Also, cuticles? What are those? Haven't seen mine in a while!

2) My scent? Not the yummy Ferragamo my hubby bought me a couple of years ago that I STILL haven't finished. Oh no. These days it's Eau du Spit-up, which is an interesting blend of sour spoiled milk with a hint of buttered popcorn (more one or the other depending on how digested the spit-up is, yum!). Also have developed a lovely B.O. since giving birth, gotta love those hormones!! Since finding out I was pregnant I stopped using regular deoderant and have been using this great liquid crystal roll-on for over a year now. While pregnant, it worked awesome, I never stunk!! But since giving birth, omg, yuck. It's getting better, slowly, but now summer is drawing near and I'm afraid. But I refuse to wear regular deo cuz of the chemicals and links to breast cancer, and don't know how well the natural sticks work, and what I love about the crystal deo is no more deo stains on my clothes!! Ugh.

3) My hair also screams new mom. Thinning, receding (Again, thanks hormones! Everyone assures me it's temporary, I can only hope!!), and always in a pony tail because little one loves to grab it and pull. He also loves to grab my jugular, I'm serious, my actual vein. If  you don't hear from me for a couple of days, just assume that he's ripped it right on out of my neck and look for my obit in the Sunday paper.

4) Jeans and a t-shirt. I'm so so so bored, but this seems to be the only thing I can wear these days. Because of aforementioned spit-up, I don't dare wear anything delicate that can't be washed and dried regularly. I can't wear any relatively low-cut tops cuz I'm always leaning over to get Kenzo into or out of his stroller, and when carrying him he's pulling my neckline dangerously low. I also can't wear dresses because of breastfeeding. What am I gonna do, hike up the entire dress up above my boobs in the middle of the park? Riiiiiiiight. Speaking of jeans, can I just say that my favorite pair right now are maternity jeans from my sister? hahaha!! Even funnier, I couldn't wear them when I was actually pregnant! They're not the full panel kind, they have a thick elastic that went under the belly and was too tight on me, I was worried about hurting the baby! I've been back in my regular clothes since about 2 months postpartum, but these preggo jeans are just so damn comfortable, with the added benefit of skimming valuable seconds off of you trip to the bathroom cuz there is no button or zipper to mess with! haha!!

5) I love wearing Kenzo in his Mei Tai carrier, but there is one big fat problem. Key word here is FAT: Back Fat, Muffin Top, whatever you want to call it. The ties of the carrier dig right into my fat child bearing hips and it's NOT an attractive look. Yikes.

6) As mentioned above in #1, baby has been gnawing on my hands and arms lately. I'm like a human teether, and I enjoy it! But ashy arms is the price I pay since I don't dare use lotion knowing he'll be lapping it up in no time!

7) I've never had the best posture, but since having a baby I have become the hunchback of Bay Ridge! Hours upon hours of walking around bouncing the baby in those first couple of months did it. And now, hunching over the stroller or the crib or the playpen or the changing table, or sitting on the floor playing with him. I need some sort of back brace to force me to sit and stand up straight.

8) I'll finish up on a positive note. I have finally painted my toe nails!!! I couldn't reach my feet (comfortably) during the last few months of pregnancy, and after popping the baby out it was winter so what was the point. And if I was too tired to shower, how could I possibly paint my toe nails? But now spring is upon us and I finally got around to a self-pedicure. Looking down at my feet they look so alien!! What are these hot pink growths on my feet?? But, it was about time. Now if I could just start pumicing and lotioning them up on a regular basis, they might actually be presentable by mid-summer...

Note the wedding ring tan line... Total stroller-pusher! The part of the fingers that wrap around the handle are still pale!